At the end of the day it’s about our relationships and our ability to be a friend that allow us to grow into the person that our parents wanted us to be.

For me, my abilities and talents though important, are not the key aspect of what I value. For me its about being a friend and developing relationships. Though driven in me by my faith, I feel the best leaders I have worked with not only inspire my brain but my heart.

Some would say that in business it is not a good idea to get to “personal” with those that you work with. Involvement in people life’s can be a risky situation. You have to be careful not to “invite” yourself into people life’s where it may be unwelcome. There is also the chance that sometimes people will take advantage especially when the relationship is with folks that report in to you.

But taking the time time to get to know someone always pays off. Being a friend or even just a listening ear, allows you to understand what makes that person who they are. Knowing this allows you to communicate more effectively with that person as well as what motivates them.

I have seen these things in my professional career and I can say that my success as a leader has a had a lot to do with how I treat and respect people. I have not always said or done the right thing. But because I allow myself to be known by those around me, I have been shown grace when I make mistakes.

I am not saying you should strive to be best friends with everyone you work with, that’s not practical. But a friendly gesture of kindness when someone is not feeling well or a simple email wishing someone well after the birth of their newborn baby, can go a long way. I haven’t always been good at these “soft skills” of management. But through some wonderful acts of people I have worked with over the years and some very good mentors, I continue to learn and grow in this area.

As you strive to be a a good leader don’t forget that it starts with being a good person. Not that you will always be successful in this but it’s a journey not race, just keep trying!